mcgees.org

Amazon dot effing com sold out of Michael Jackson.  So did SecondSpin.  Everything on Half that’s priced under $15 or so is gone, and mp3 sites are showing that (last time I checked) 8 out of the top 10 albums are Jacko’s.  SwapaCD members, collectively, list one album title and four singles titles (I’d link directly to the searches, but I want people to use my referral ID when they come looking to buy Michael Jackson CDs.)  The one that remains is Dabgerous, “the rare multi-platinum, number one album that qualifies as a nearly forgotten, underappreciated record”, according to the perennial dick reviewer Stephen Thomas Erlewine (apparently grunge was this album’s undoing.)

I haven’t looked it up, but aren’t there >10⁸ copies out there floating around?

» Buy Michael Jackson Albums on Amazon

Why pay the regular price of 2 for 99¢ when you can pay the discounted price: 2 for 99¢ (or, to be fair, you may be paying 2 for $99 today, which at least is a different price.)

2003: Open a pack of Magic: The Gathering’s set Portal: Three Kingdoms and find an Imperial Recruiter.

2005: Think about selling said card.  Check value: $2 - $3.  “This is breakable,” I think.  “I’m going to hold on to it.”

2007: Think about selling said card.  Check value: $2 - $3.  “This is still breakable,” I think.  “I’m going to hold on to it.”

2009: Think once more about selling said card.  Check value: $86 - $130.

I guess someone broke it.  I think I’ll sell it now.

Here’s one way to get me to click on your ad:

The shirts are crazily overpriced, which is sad, because, in addition to that one above, tons of them are fantastic, including ones depicting an argument between mathematical constants, consoling a dwarf planet, featuring friendly crocodilians parting, helping panhandle for a Montoyan cause, and trying a weirdly-semantic pickup line.

No kickback and, as I said, ridiculously overpriced.  Still tons of fun to browse.

“Unconsumption is a word used to describe everything that happens after an act of acquisition.”

Would it be conspicuous concern — signaling — to mention that I intend to buy nothing new this year (save consumables, which I’m also trying to reduce)?  I’ll gamble on that not being the case, wager that the net positive effect for the planet, by publicizing this idea, will be significantly higher than the possible increase in esteem by readers.

(via Richard Eriksson)

If anyone else posted this I’d call this spam, but as I am the deity:

I have a coupon for $50 off a purchase of $125 or more at eBags, which is a store I really like, but I don’t need $125 worth of stuff from them right now.  This is not a free coupon I discovered, this is one I earned through an affiliate program.  There are the normal eBags contractual brand exclusions.

I’d take a $30 Amazon gc for it, or best offer.  Or, if no one offers to trade, I’d just give it to you if you asked nicely enough.

Anyone know of a site where such things can be traded (à la Plastic Jungle?)

I haven’t gotten mine yet, but there is a swaggy Free Desk Lamp on offer.  It’s ad-supported.  A razor blade might take care of that, depending on what it’s painted with.

There are people you really, really don’t want to piss off.  I can’t believe I’m about to increase their PageRank, but here it is.

The complete series megaset of Danger Mouse (the show, my clever electronica fans) is available for $10 on preorder.

Believe it or not, I’m not getting a kickback on this one.

I’d like to take a moment to endorse a great company (and, full disclosure, important site advertiser), Superior Titanium.  They sell a range of goods made from titanium, many of which make great holiday gifts, especially their fantastic money clips, which I swear by (Literally.  I’ve inscribed Bible verses on mine and everything.)

OK, I’m a whore, but:

Not for me, but for, you know, someone.  Someone hard to shop for.  With internet access.  Who might live a long way away.  Use that link, if you would.

Hey Readers,

As you probably know, I’m an Amazon Affiliate.  I’m not really allowed to say this out loud, but (obviously) when you buy Amazon stuff through my links, I get a kickback.  It doesn’t add up to much.

I’m also a heavy-duty Amazon buyer, spending maybe $500-$1000 (sometimes more) per year.  I’m the problem child for their Amazon Prime problem: they lose money on me constantly.

Problem is, if I buy through my Affiliate ID, all my sales stats are snuffed out because I cannot get a kickback on my own sales.

So what I’m looking for is another Affiliate who is also a heavy Amazon buyer (let’s put that at $500+/year.)  We’ll each generate a text link with our Associate ID embedded, bookmark each other’s, and promise to go to Amazon always through that link.

If more than one of you is interested, we could daisy-chain it (A→B, B→C, C→A, or whatever).

This post may not last forever, since it is subverting Amazon, but if you (Richard?  Jordon?  Marco?  Polo?) want to trade, LMK.

So, the issue comes up: where to buy stamps online now?  eBay has priced themselves out of the game (so there is no way for people to profit sell cheaper stamps there any longer) and, after dealings with Mark Rosenberg of StampWants (who, incidentally, wrote a threatening letter to me to remove my original statements from this site) I learned several things:

1. Live in or collect a country other than the United States?  There is a good chance that you do not warrant a category on StampWants in Mr. Rosenberg’s assessment.  Check the site’s categories for yourself.  Mr. Rosenberg considers this a business decision.  I see it as an important sample point in ensuring that the rest of the world remains a “special interest group” on StampWants.

2. Mr. Rosenberg is happy to claim experimental results that show that adding that country you care about as a category would ruin StampWants, but is unwilling to share the data (as would be standard practice in the scientific community.

3. I find Mr. Rosenberg tremendously cocksure when it comes to his own opinions, answering questions in a way that I consider rude and to perpetually dodge the point, with logic I find fallacious.  To add insult to injury, he then accuses me of continuing to change the topic.

There are more reasons, but that should suffice for most readers, I suspect.  Contact me if you want more.  As I alluded to earlier, I received an absolutely adorable attempt at a cease-and-desist letter written by Mr. Rosenberg, in which he continues to behave in a manner I consider rude in the same breath that he denies ever having been rude in the first place.  So instead of waiting for a frame-worthy cease-and-desist letter written by someone with, oh, say, training, I’ve rephrased the preceding (as a courtesy) to explicitly state my interpretations of Rosenberg’s behavior.

In any case, my First-Amendment-protected recommendation (which follows my First-Amendment-protected opinions) is: avoid StampWants.  And the funny thing?  My rephrasing, driven by Mark’s tired letter, extends the length of my negative assessment of his site and him by a couple orders of magnitude.

His non-StampWants email is markcrosenberg@gmail.com, by the way.

So, instead of StampWants, I turned to the awesome Delcampe auction site and went to Moneybookers to pay, as the dealer had requested.

Moneybookers is the European equivalent of PayPal, and it’s kind of neat to deal to deal with overseas companies as an American, and think about what it’s like for overseas citizens to do the reverse.  It’s like walking around with your arm in a sling.  For instance: ways to fund your account.  You can pay from your bank account, if you find the carefully-hidden place to add an American account (because American banks don’t support IBAN, and Moneybookers pretty much assumes your bank does.)  You can also fund your “wallet” with a credit card, for a 1.9% fee.  Worldwide, they take Visa, MasterCard, American Express, and Diner’s Club.  Except in the States.  There you can use Visa, American Express, or Diner’s Club — but not MasterCard, due to unspecified “security issues”.  Does anyone have the slightest idea what is going on there?  I am so used to Visa and MasterCard being uttered in the same breath.  They even show up together on the same store window decal.  And I really wanted to use a Mastercard (specifically, my PayPal MasterCard).

Check out 960946038000 and marvel at the über-efficiency of FedEx!  They really are frakking unbelievable.  I think it’s time to invest.

Some of you have already gotten this in an email from me, but I strongly advise you to sign up for Obopay.  In short, it’s a secure way to send money from your mobile phone to another person’s mobile phone, even if he or she has not signed up yet.  It’s much like Paypal, with the killer app being the restaurant phenomenon of no one having enough cash: this way, everyone can text their contribution to one person, who then puts the bill on a credit card (it needs a PIN, so if someone steals your phone, they cannot empty your bank account or credit card.)

Also useful for movie tickets, splitting parking costs, paying for auctions, and so forth.  Unlike Paypal, which takes a (large!) percentage of the money from the seller, Obopay just charges the sender a small fee (for now it’s a dime, but it’s going up to a quarter next month.)

OK, here’s the pitch: sign up using that link I’ve provided, and I’ll get a referral bonus.  I could really use the cash.  As soon as you add a funding source, you’ll be set up as an Obopay registered user.  Then, I’ll send you $1 (via Obopay) — your first Obopay receipt — as thanks.  OK?  Please sign up your mobile phone, and use one of the links.

U.S. only for right now, sorry.

Merci.

Answer to What We Pay For Gold at GoldKit:

The first question many people ask us is: What is the price you will pay for my scrap gold? To answer this, we need to weigh and evaluate your items. […] The amount of your check will depend on this evaluation.

And Prices We Pay at Cash4Gold?

Material	10 - 50 oz	50 - 100 oz
8K	$12.03(dwt)	$12.68(dwt)
10K	$13.43(dwt)	$14.03(dwt)
12K	$15.01(dwt)	$16.44(dwt)
14K	$16.59(dwt)	$18.85(dwt)
18K	$22.02(dwt)	$24.87(dwt)
22K	$28.72(dwt)	$29.30(dwt)
24K	$31.27(dwt)	$33.00(dwt)
PLATINUM	$48.36(dwt)	$51.06(dwt)
Jewelry (Plat.)	$43.53(dwt)	$45.94(dwt)
STERLING	$8.40ozt	$9.60ozt
.999 SILVER	$9.20ozt	$12.60ozt

So they’re not world-shattering prices, but I think I’d recommend the known quantity, thank-you-very-much.  ‘K, bye, GoldKit!

There’s an eBay lot that I really, really want.  The auction closes in less than one hour (4:40 a.m. PDT is probably some sensible time in Johannesburg, where the seller resides), and the bidding is at 14% of my high bid.  I would love to get this lot for 14% of my high bid.

I can’t sleep, as you can probably tell, so I’ve been fiddling (they call it a “one tweak loop” in computerese) with the sidebar.  Let me know what you think — if you can tell the difference.

Firefox did not complain about the word “computerese”.  Wow.

“We get a lot of stiff skepticism and disbelief from our first time clients all the time, and its okay, we’re used to it.”

Yeah?  No kidding.  Add me to that list.

Anyone care to support, debunk, or otherwise comment on this “miracle” product?

Amazon is/are having great deals on Victorinox knives.  (That last sentence is a link.)

Act quickly.

Posting this as a favor:

My friend is selling his used Powerbook.  I have seen the machine in the past, and it is in great condition, and amazingly light.  I can vouch for his honesty, and for the care he takes of his possessions (when I purchased vintage MAGIC cards from him, they were some of the most pristine I have seen.)  He says:

I am trying to sell my 12 inch Powerbook.  It has really been babied.  It has a few minor hairline scratches on the bottom (obviously does not effect performance and they can barely be seen).  Specs are below:

1.5GHz PowerPC G4
1.25GB DDR SDRAM
60GB 5400RPM
12″ LCD - 1024×768
GeForce FX Go5200 64MB
DVD/CD-RW Combo Drive
Wireless Airport Extreme
Bluetooth Built-in

Accessories:
Booq Powersleeve 12 inch (white/grey)

Asking $800 + shipping
Email: evanskeeee@yahoo.com
Pictures — www.spikedstudios.com/powerbook

I expect it’s small enough to fit — with padding — in a Priority Mail Flat Rate Box, which means shipping in the U.S. will run you about $10 (double-check with him on that, I haven’t asked him.)

My e-friend (and erstwhile contract artist) Ashley has a new line of hand-sewn adoptable critters.  Throw out your Beanie Babies!  These are the real deal.  Hand-sewn, with one eye on a green planet (most are made from recycled materials), one eye on serious art (the designs are highly competent), and the third eye (don’t ask) on whimsy (one-eyed chocolate-brown plush bunnies, anyone?), these adoptable creatures need your home.  They’re stuffed with poly-fill so they’re soft and resilient.

I held off posting until I could secure adoption rights for the mammoth.  I may be commissioning a penguin.  Or five.

Seriously, check them out.  Here’s a link:

The PowerSquid, one of the most clever products in history, is now available with a <1 nanosecond response-time, 540 joule surge suppressor.  List price is $34.95; the store Affordable Home Electronics has^* it for $9.44 and low shipping.

^* Happy, Dave?  I arranged the sentence so that I could use a singular verb.

Actual exchange from the last time I bought a suit (which will probably be the last for some time):

Salesman:  How much were you planning on spending today?
Joshua:  Oh, I don’t know, maybe $300?
Salesman:  (Rueful chuckle:) No.  But maybe $400.
Joshua:  OK.  I was thinking something with a European cut.
Salesman:  (Rueful chuckle:) No.  You’re not built for a European cut.  Here’s a nice suit for $400.
Joshua:  Um, I was hoping that would include a shirt and tie…
Salesman:  (Rueful chuckle:) No.  (etc.)

Kinda reminiscent of Dave Barry trying to make an offer on the real estate agent’s office, no?

At the end of the ass-rape, I thanked him.  Can you believe that?  Sick, sick!  Holding onto his picture, dressing up (in that suit!) every day…

Hello, where am I?  Sorry.

Here’s your Google-foo assignment: I’m looking for a serious, fancy leather wallet, one of the “lay flat” inner-coat-pocket types, not one of the bifold or trifold varieties trouser-pocket types.

It has to be long enough to hold currency notes, checks, tickets, passport, etc. flat, and should ideally have a metric assload of little sewn pockets for credit and ID cards, all arranged neatly in n columns, where n could be as low as one.  This panel can fold out/fold open/whatever.

For bonus points, photo display and a zipper pouch for a guitar pick (which I always carry with me).

Hand-tooled?  Moroccan leather?  Italian workmanship?  Requires oiling?  Sky’s the limit.  Actually, about $200 is the limit.  Low-hanging-clouds-in-the-sky is the limit.  I could probably go to $300.  I want this shit to look good, something that says “Holy shit, that guy’s got a wallet wallet!”

12 months’ free advertising on this post (first placement, editor’s discretion still applies) to the person who finds exactly what I desire.

… and bingo!

I’ve started selling CDs online seriously.  I needed storage.  You really can find anything online these days, can’t you?  Look at those prices!  I’m getting two: one shelf for each letter of the alphabet, with X⁄Y⁄Z taking up one, combined.

Getting by on eBay and Half.com is frequently a question of a few cents here and there, and volume.  Here are some tips.  Subscribe to this post’s comments as I come up with more, or post your own (non-commercial, please, although paid advertisements are accepted.)

1.  If you can find a mailer that weighs less than 3⁄4 oz., normal CDs in jewel cases can ship for the 4-oz. First Class Parcel rate ($1.64 at the time of this writing) rather than the 5- or 6-oz. rate ($1.81 or $1.99).  Uline Bubble Mailers, model S-5897, are 9 lbs. per 200 units.  Dividing that gives you a weight of 0.72 oz. each, and that 9 lbs. is probably rounded up, and includes the weight of the box.  Envelopes are self-sealing, so you save on tape weight.  One case of 200 is $51 ($0.255 apiece) plus shipping.  This can make a huge difference on $0.75 CDs with small shipping allowances.

2.  Large shipping labels are expensive; at their cheapest, one- or two-per-page labels are about $0.28 a sheet.  Try printing on normal printer paper, and spraying the back with Elmer’s Craft Bond (~$7 per 11 oz. can, lighter and cheaper than tape, and lasts seemingly forever.)  Apply paper to mailer within 15 seconds of spraying for permanent adhesion.

3.  Addressing small envelopes?  Use cheap labels, and don’t worry about your printer gobbling up your expensive envelopes.  Buy Avery 5160-compatible labels in quantity, then use OpenOffice.org’s templates (software and templates free) to print a couple at a time (templates here.)  Buy them 3,000 at a time from Uline and pay 6⁄10^ths of a penny apiece (don’t worry, it’s exactly the same price as 300 will cost you at Office Depot.  Hard to believe…)  Keep running the same sheet through your printer as you need new labels, just change the positioning on the page.  Want POSTNET barcodes on the labels to speed them through the mailstream?  Give me a couple weeks.  I’m writing software to do that, and I’ll make it available for free on this site (haven’t decided whether it should be a web app or a downloadable executable).

4.  For items 13 oz. or lighter, use PayPal to print out a First Class Parcel label at the 1 oz. rate, regardless of what the item weighs, and pay the $0.18 for Delivery Confirmation (always splurge on this, it’s the best investment out there.)  Use the printer-paper-and-spray-glue trick above.  Make up the remaining weight ($0.17 per ounce, as of this writing) with discount postage (valid, legal U.S. postage from stamp dealers in non-current denominations, available from Henry Gitner for 93% face postpaid, or at your local free-admission stamp show for 88% - 90% face.)  On an 11-oz item, you save $0.17, which just about pays for the Delivery Confirmation!  Print up little decorative labels (less than a penny apiece, remember) that say something like “Collect Stamps: It’s Fun!” or “Philately: The Quiet Excitement!” and people will actually thank you for saving yourself money.  Everyone likes pretty stamps on their mail.  If you have time, to speed it through the mailstream, ask the clerk to count the postage and put a $0.00 label on the package for you.  They will happily do this if you’re humble.  Try something like “I’m not sure my postal scale is accurate at home, would you mind weighing this for me and seeing if I have enough postage?”  And while you’re there, ask nicely for hand-cancellations on the stamps to make the recipient even happier.

5.  Buy a laser printer.  They cost pennies on the dollar to operate, compared to an inkjet.  Even if you have to put it on a high-interest credit card, do it.  It will pay for itself so quickly it takes your breath away.

6.  Go to “Printer Settings” — whatever it’s called on your Operating System —  and set everything to print as “Grayscale”.  Save your expensive color toner for times when you’re printing for yourself, not printing packing slips.

7.  Use Auctiva to list on eBay.  It’s easier to use than eBay itself, offers any number of free pictures, free super-sizing of images, a “store window” applet to increase additional add-on sales, easy re-listing, free scheduling, automatic feedback settings, convenient “Profiles” for commonly-sold items, free professional templates, and tons more.  Don’t waste your money on Blackthorne or pricey eBay “listing upgrades”!  And remember, very soon, eBay Gallery for your item ($0.35 per auction, and essentially required for successful sales) is going to be free.

8.  For stamps, avoid eBay entirely and go to StampWants.  StampWants is so cheap it’s almost free, it’s designed specifically for stamps, and is so inexpensive you can sell items for a dime and make a profit (just try that on eBay.)  Have more than 50 items to sell?  Get a store at StampWants!  It pays for itself with lightning speed.

9.  First illegal one: selling miniature liquor bottles?  Try it, it’s a high-margin item.  You aren’t supposed to send them through the mail, but the clerk can sometimes feel the liquid sloshing and will ask.  Mark them “Fragile: Snow Globes”.  I’ve never met a clerk so mean as to keep little ol’ snow globes from collectors’ hands.  On eBay, to sell the bottles, cut-and-paste exactly the “collectible container” text that you can find under “Prohibited Items”, and (they don’t tell you this) add a line that says “Sorry, I can only ship to the U.S.  eBay’s rules”.  Don’t offer any international shipping rates.  In my experience, overseas bidders will ask you anyway.  Use your discretion on what you want to do, but one possibility is to tell them to inform eBay, if they ask, that they’re using a U.S. address (I’ve never had them ask a bidder.)  Then go ahead and charge them $7.99 (most happily pay this rate) and ship the bottle overseas.  Everyone loves Snow Globes! 

10. Set a reminder for yourself — an alarm in Outlook, a cronjob, a Yahoo! alert, or something — to fire some time during the first week of each month.  Then download the previous month’s PayPal history.  Save a copy, print a copy, and upload a copy to Google Documents.  Come year-end, when the tax man comes knocking, you will be startled that PayPal only offers 90 days’ worth of account activity to download.

11. Keep a mileage log, to and from your post office and PMB.  Don’t have a PMB?  Again, it’s a great investment.  Don’t, under any circumstance, use your home address on eBay or on whois pages.  If you’re doing this daily, you’ll have hundreds of miles to deduct as a business expense at the end of the year.

OK, there’s eleven to start with.  Please contribute.

(Note added 26 February 2008: Instead of selling on eBay or Half.com to make money, of course, you could do what “Max” did, and repost my selling tips and ask for donations!  Oh, right, we’re paying for his research!  Silly me.)

Ooh ooh ooh — sneaky!

There is a TV spot running now to “help” consumers.  It’s paid for by the Cable Television industry.  It tells consumers that beginning 17 February 2009, all broadcast stations will stop broadcasting in analog, and only broadcast in digital.  It tells the viewer that all televisions hooked up to cable service will continue to work.  In a slightly-overplayed “reasonable” tone, it tells the viewer that “If you receive your television through an antenna, your television can still work with a converter box.”  It directs you to dtv2009.gov, and tells you you can “apply for a coupon” there.  Then the guy folds his arms, looks smug, and the cable logo comes out.

A bit more background: the man is walking across salt flats as he speaks.  He passes a 1960s furniture-size television with a flickering picture that finally resolves.

Implied:  Broadcast TV is a barren landscape
Implied:  Broadcast TV is antiquated
Implied:  Broadcast TV flickers
Implied:  Satellite won’t work either
Implied:  Applying for the coupons is a government program, and as much of a hassle as going to the DMV
Implied:  You will still have to buy something, it will just be a little cheaper with the coupon

OK, the facts.  Yes, on 17 February 2009, analog TVs will not be able to receive broadcasts without the intercession of a converter box.  But:

Satellite works just as well as Cable during the transition
The coupon application process is simple, and can be accessed online, by phone, or by mail
The coupons are for $40 apiece, and every household is entitled to two for free
Converter boxes are expected to cost no more than $50, and I’d bet anyone that ten dollar difference that Walmart will have one for $39.99 before the switchover date

This is, essentially, a push-poll in television advertising format.  It pretends to be benign or even helpful, while in fact it is intensely devious.  Shame on the cable industry, preying upon one of the least-empowered sections of society: those who generally cannot reasonably afford cable or satellite television.

I’m looking for a stationery embosser / book embosser.  This Acorn Pocket Library Embosser looks pretty good.  Anyone own it?  Anyone know of a cheaper and/or better one?

OK, not “The Amazon”, but Amazon.com.

I just got email notification that my order has shipped.  At a quarter to ten.  P.M.  On a Sunday.  What sort of crazy deal does Amazon have with UPS, anyway?

Serious question.  Anyone know?  They have to be sending thousand of tons — more — of stuff a year to all over the globe with this carrier.  UPS must be wetting itself.  What’s it offering?  24/7 pickups, huge price breaks, what?  There has to be something screwy going on for Amazon Prime to be profitable, for instance (Two day shipping, for free, on anything, for $70 per year?  It can’t all be the Costco/Health Club algorithm of “they’ll pay but not use”, can it?)

OhForTheLoveOfAllThatIsSacred.  WTF?  A “commemorative” “9/11″ “coin” clad in silver recovered from Ground Zero? (Warning: link contains sound, moving graphics, and extremely bad taste).

I think I’m going to actually vomit.  I don’t fucking care that they supposedly give 16% (not counting handling charges) of their proceeds to charity.  These people need to be flogged.